if it kills me

Jason Mraz's "If it kills me"- brought to my attention courtesy bf. Also showed me this Youtube video where they used the song in "So you think you can dance"

The song's good enough on its own merit. But paired with those dancers- amazing!

"Well, you and I

We go carrying on for hours on end

We get along much better

Than you and your boyfriend"

Yeah, right. Have never hankered for a friend who's in a relationship with someone else- thank Heavens. Have never really had a huge crush or imagined myself in love with a close friend either. Wonder how it feels like - the hope that they will find out and reciprocate, and the fear that they will find out and it would end the friendship

"How long can i go on like this

Wishing to kiss you

Before I rightly explode?

Well, this double life I lead isn't healthy for me

in fact it makes me nervous

If I get caught I could be risking it all

Cause baby there's a lot that I'd miss

In case Im wrong"

A quandary. Reveal and you could either win all or lose all. Because friendships seldom remain the same when feelings are revealed to be not-so-platonic. And maybe its better to let things stay as they are, cause having his/her friendship is far far better than losing her/ him outright. But then, there will be the niggling feeling of "What if?"

"If I should be so bold

I'd ask you to hold my heart in my hand

I'd tell you from the start how Ive longed to be your man

But I never said I would

I guess I'm gonna miss my chance again"

That said, I can't really relate to the song. Am just happy I found myself with a bf who's one of my closest friends as well as my love. And that's why I can relate to the refrain:

"I'll find a way to you if it kills me

If it kills me"